Next Level Recycling

This month, we’re focusing on the most identifiable action of “going green.” It’s not Kermit T. Frog (however, that little amphibian has lots to say about being green) It’s not the Green Monster at Fenway. Nor is it the horrible (but oh so delicious) Shamrock Shake. Of course, I’m going to be talking about recycling.

But, while we’re on the subject, I wonder if McDonalds has any idea how much money they would make if they made their little green shake available year-round. The profits alone from my wallet would probably make it worth their time. I’m sure there was a marketing guy who thought up the term “engineered demand” and threw the idea to his bosses and they ran with it, leaving us poor suckers waiting for the magical time of year when we can punish our bodies. (And don’t get me started on the McRib!)

leveluprecycling

If you think about recycling as a game, you and the planet can both win!

Where was I? Oh yes, recycling?! Yes, that sounds more like the purview of this blog. Recycling: taking something you have and don’t need anymore and turning it into something else…hopefully, again and again. It’s one of the pillars of the environmentalism movement. It’s what we’ve been hearing for decades, and the necessity of recycling is finally being taken seriously. We can see this by how simple it is to do in our society.

Look at any recycling tote. You can get a little plastic tote and fill it with mixed recyclables willy-nilly. Papers, bottles and cans (and just clap your hands) can be picked up every week from your curb. No hassle. No sorting. They do that for you at the center. All you have to do is make sure you put your recyclables in that tote and bring it to the curb. Here’s a quick FAQ if you’re looking for a list of curbside recyclables. Recycling is so easy. It’s so mainstream. Some might even say too easy and too mainstream.

Well, I’ve got some ideas that will help you go to the next level.

Ok, you’ve done the curbside recycling. You want to know what the next step is; what other more challenging ways to recycle are out there. Have you thought about actually going to the landfill? Oh, man. They’ll recycle anything there! Have an old mattress? They’ve got you covered. Did you just get a new electrically efficient refrigerator? Recycling centers will take that old broken thing off your hands.

Or! If you have rechargeable batteries, old ink cartridges, or old cell phones, you can drive out to Best Buy, Staples, Office Max, or many other big box stores and drop them off. Curbside recycling doesn’t usually accept these items, so it’s great that these companies have stepped up and will recycle them for you. (Just remember to shop locally, when you can.

The next level of recycling would be, naturally, to recycle your own urine.

This guy is asking his entire family to “donate” for his compost pile. Not a bad use of bodily fluids, to be honest, and it definitely gives you green cred.

But, okay, you’re saying. I’m pretty hardcore. I’ve been recycling my urine for years, now. There’s got to be a way for me to recycle to the maximum! There is. Have you considered recycling…yourself.

Think about it. There is nothing more extreme than offering up your body. When you die, you have many options on how your body will be…ahem…thrown away. But, the bottom line is, your body will be recycled no matter what you decide to do with it. Burned, buried or BBQ’d, your body will decompose and transfer its nutrients to the environment, offering a perfect opportunity for you to reach that most extreme recycling level.

soylentgreenheston

Are willing to take your recycling to the next level? Would you recycle your body?

So, if you’re not going to notice, why not offer your body up to be recycled? Human bones can be ground up, turned to glue and used in dental surgery. Skin can be used for burn victims. Fat has it’s uses. Tendons can give people mobility. Even a damaged body will have utility after it’s deceased. I’m not suggesting that we go down the Soylent Green option, however, donating your body for research, organ transplants, and surgery practice are all legitimate uses of your body.

But, seriously, if you’re interested in being an organ donor, all you need to do is head on over to your local DMV and let them know or you can go to this site.  After registering, it’s also important to communicate the fact you have to your loved ones.

For more options on recycling, check out http://www.recyclingcenters.org/Minnesota/

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